I’m fairly easy going me, ask anyone who knows,
Not the sort with temper quick that any time might blow.
But I admit that niggles get underneath my skin
And wriggle about ‘til I want to shout – although I keep it in.
Here’s a particular niggle that got me yesterday.
I’d done my weekly shopping which cost a monthly pay.
I select my stuff with cared concern and read the tiny print,
For numbers E there’d better not be even the slightest hint.
According to my usual ways, my groceries were bought
No nasties lurking in the pile of an unhealthy sort.
I bought a load of rice cakes because as you must know
these ricy treats are devoid of wheat and their calories are low.
I tend to buy organic, wherever I possibly can
And where available Fair Trade too, to aid my fellow man.
But despite my best endeavours they got me – I was had
By a packaging con my eye lit upon, and that’s why I’m feeling mad.
There upon the packet in a friendly looking type
I read the words incorrectly and got caught up in the hype.
I should have read it slowly, in part it is my fault
I went and bought a packet saying ‘Without Sea Salt’!!!
Now I try not to be pedantic or anything like that
But when you say that kind of thing why not say
‘Without a bowler hat’?
‘Without the very best banana you can buy’
‘without a magic powder that enables you to fly’?
‘Without a golden slipper or a baby kangaroo’?
or ‘Without Jam made of mangoes’ or ‘without elephant poo’?
The list could go forever so I won’t go on in this bent.
Perhaps you’d like to add your own ‘Without’ in the space where folk comment?
Just let your imagination go where the ad men’s do
And list what you’d like to go without, I‘d love to hear from you.
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