We were friends for a very long time
until you stole that boy of mine.
I wanted to scream and scratch out your eyes
and other things not half as nice.
I dreamed of dancing on your grave
watching you drown in a tidal wave.
I wanted to hurt you like you hurt me,
I wanted it so much I couldn't eat my tea.
Then he dumped you - what a laugh.
You cried in Maths and smudged your graph.
You cried in Geog and wet your map
I felt so glad I wanted to clap.
A week's gone by, enough's enough
it's time to stop taking it all so rough.
Let's go out and just go mad,
but remember - keep your mits off my new lad.