The Groom's Speech.
You turned up to my wedding
with everything on show,
put people off the wedding feast
and we'd purchased Sturgeon's Roe!
All that wobbling fleshy stuff,
the bride is most dis-cheered,
eclipsed by a vision of nakedness
that left our eyeballs seared!
Frilly satin peep-show clothes,
here's some plain talking folks:
I do not care for what you wear,
it's not a good look on blokes!
Inspired by a comment on the Daily Mail about a story regarding Princess Michael of Kent's rather flamboyant choice of attire as Mother of the Groom and the reported eclipsing of the lovely bride - Sophie Winkleman now Mrs Freddie Windsor.
But what about MEN? Why is it always women being discussed on articles like this? - Sophie, London, UK
Until Sophie's comment I had to admit it hadn't occurred to me that men might turn up at weddings in low-cut frilly dresses or worse - which was extremely sexist of me. But then I did consider it and a poem was born.
Here's the link to the article in the mail: